5 ways to help someone who stutters

If you’re someone who doesn’t stutter, you might have a number of questions about what to do when talking to someone who does, and how you can best help them. If you’re worried you might offend them, or you’re unsure of the best way to phrase a question, then read on.

Support and therapy - mentoring

As with everything else, people who stutter are all very different, and as a result, individuals may have their own preferences on what they want listeners to do when they are stuttering. For instance, it’s generally considered that the cardinal rule of helping a person who stutters is to let them finish their sentence, but there are still a few people who stutter who prefer others to finish their sentences for them – to “get it over with” as some have described it. It’s good practice to always ask someone what they prefer, but if you’d rather avoid it, then it’s best to let them finish.

So, other than letting them finish, what are other ways you can help a person who stutters?

  1. Don’t tell them how to stop stuttering

Unless you are a qualified Speech Language Therapist, it usually isn’t helpful if you tell them how to stop stuttering, or if you’ve found a cure. The majority of people who stutter have done so most of their lives, and have likely been through therapy and done their own research on how to improve their fluency. There is no known cure, and often anecdotes of your own family members or acquaintances who have cured their stutter will not help the person you are talking to.

  1. Don’t make jokes about stuttering

Although stuttering remains a punchline for many comedians, writers, and everyday people, it’s often no laughing matter for a person who stutters. It can be an extremely debilitating experience, and to find that your dysfluency is the butt of a joke can be tough.

  1. Let them know you are here to talkis there a cure for stuttering

Stuttering can be very isolating, and people who stutter often feel as though they miss out on social interactions that other people have. If someone in your life stutters, make sure they know that you’re there for them, and that you support them. Letting them finish their sentences is the first step, but being a great friend is even better. Listening actively and making sure they know it’s ok to talk about stuttering with you is a great way to help a person who stutters.

  1. Stand up for them

While we hope there never comes a time that a person who stutters is bullied, or discriminated against either at school, in the workplace, or anywhere else, the reality is that these situations can still happen. If a person who stutters in your life is experiencing negativity or discrimination, it’s important that you discuss it with them and stand up for them.

  1.  Stand with them

Every person who stutters is different. Some prefer to accept their stutter and leave it as is, while others are more interested in treatment and exercises to help with fluency and confidence. Some find that they have anxiety due to their stutter, whereas others don’t. Some prefer you to speak for them, while others want you to let them finish. If there is a person in your life who stutters, find out what works best for them, and stand with them in their decisions.

Stuttering vs stammering – what’s the difference?

Very occasionally, we have people asking us what the distinction is between stammering and stuttering. It’s an understandable question, and with the two words floating around it’s difficult to tell which is the right one to use.

We’re here to set the record straight, once and for all.

There is no difference – sort of.

A quick Google search will give you a number of answers, with many people claiming that a stutter is the repetition of letters, whereas a stammer is the blocking and prolongations. There are others who say it is a clinical distinction used by professionals, and there are some who claim that a stutter is something you are born with and a stammer is something you develop due to trauma or nerves.

The reason that both stutter and stammer exist and describe the same speech dysfluency is because stammer is a mostly British term, whereas stutter is largely used in the US, as well as New Zealand and Australia.

A great explanation of this is by Lynne Murphy, a linguist who writes the blog ‘Separated by a Common Language’. Lynne has used her extensive knowledge of linguistics, as well as some fantastic Googling to find how the terms are used and when, and more importantly where. Her conclusion is:

“If it is the case that stammering and stuttering are different things, then it looks like in the 1960s, they found a cure for stammering in America, and somehow that accidentally brought on more stuttering. Of course that’s not what happened. What happened is that stutter took over in [American English] as the usual term.”

This is a great explanation of the phenomenon, and puts the case to rest.

There are only 2 ways in which stutter and stammer are different:

  • One is used predominantly by American English speakers, while the other is predominantly used by British English speakers.
  • One has two extra T’s and a U, while the other has two M’s and an A

If you’re interested in more interesting facts about stuttering, head to our FAQ page and have all your questions answered!

5 ways you can help our charity that aren’t just donating money

(although we’d appreciate that too!)

As a charity, a lot of what makes our world go around is the support we receive from the community – but there’s a misconception that to help a charity you need to donate money. We’re here to dispel the rumours, and show you 5 ways you can support us without donating money! Unless you want to, in which case you can donate here.

1 . Volunteer your time

Our organisation is a relatively small charity with big goals. We know that there are roughly 45,000 people in New Zealand who stutter and we’d love to reach them all – but that takes people-power. To get to where we want to be we need to put the time in to make our charity work like a well oiled machine, and having volunteers work with us is a rewarding and fun way for you to be able to give back. Jacqui, who volunteers her time with us helping to streamline our booking process, says that volunteering with START “is really rewarding. It’s so special to see our SLTs work with the kids, and it feels good to know that there’s a place for people to go to get support.”

  1. Volunteer your expertise

As we work hard to get our charity in front of as many Kiwis as possible, we’ve found a real need for digital savvy support. Our website, PR, and other aspects of getting the word out about stuttering are all areas of our charity that require some additional expertise. If you have skills in an industry or area that you think could benefit our organisation, even in some small way, we would love to hear from you and see how we can get you on board!

  1. Purchase a copy of our book ‘My Stutter’

Last year for International Stuttering Awareness Day, we received a number of wonderful submissions from Kiwi kids who stutter, and compiled their art, poetry, and essays on stuttering into a charming book titled ‘My Stutter’. This book is a fantastic coffee-table book and conversational piece to get Kiwi’s to discuss and understand what a stutter is, and what it is like to grow up with one. Even better, all of the profits from this book go directly to our charity to help us support more Kiwi kids who stutter. You can purchase a copy here.

  1. Share your story

One of the greatest struggles we have is to share stories and anecdotes of our clients – understandably! Having a stutter can be a very personal experience that many don’t wish to share, however only with openness and shared experiences can we reach more Kiwis who may need help and support. Being open to sharing your story in the form of a testimonial, or even to be interviewed for a short video is one of the most important ways you can support our charity. We rely on these human stories to help others, and it would be the most valuable way to help us if you have worked with us. If you are interested in sharing your story, please email us at support@start.org.nz.

  1. Spread the word

The easiest way to support us is to get the message out! We need you guys to be out there as our raving fans, and it’s as simple as liking, commenting and sharing our Facebook posts, or sharing this blog post with your friends. If you have media contacts, or know a person who stutters, sharing our message and our services can make a real change. It’s as easy as clicking a button but it can help our organisation in more ways than we could count.

If you think you can help our charity, please contact us at support@start.org.nz and we’d love to hear from you!

Why don’t we stutter when we sing?

Have you ever noticed that you don’t stutter when you sing?

Or if you’re a person who doesn’t stutter, have you ever wondered why you’ve never heard someone stutter while singing? If you watch the video below of Harrison Craig – season 2 winner of The Voice Australia 2013 – you’ll understand how big the change between speaking and singing can be for someone who stutters.

It’s an interesting observation, and there’s no single answer for why this phenomenon occurs. Scientists and researchers have worked hard to answer many difficult questions about stuttering, however when it comes to the singing debate, there are a few strong theories.

Singing occurs in a different part of the brain:

The University of Iowa has done some research on this topic, and have concluded that “Music is an activity in which you use the right side of the brain (language uses the left), so when you sing music, you’re no longer using your left brain (and probably no longer stuttering).”

This is an interesting observation and could very well be why singing is unaffected by stuttering.

We use our vocal cords and mouths differently when singing:

It’s true that in order to sing (well), we need to alter the way we use our vocal cords, as well as how we shape our tongues and mouths. There is a theory that this could have a part to play in why people don’t stutter when they sing and is attributed as one of the potential reasons by The Stuttering Foundation of America.

Here at START we think it could be a combination of our using our vocal cords and mouths differently as well as singing activating a different part of the brain. As one of our SLT Voon Pang says; “the brain controls the mouth, so if the brain is telling the mouth to do something different then I suppose this could be one of the reasons why we don’t stutter when we sing.”

Singing is a different form of communication than most speaking:

Most communication is two-way. It involves an unpredictable conversation, where you can’t plan your next answer. It also holds the potential for the other person or people to interrupt, or to become impatient. Singing, however, is mostly one-way communication, and eliminates the possibility for these challenges. We have often memorised the  lyrics when we sing, rather than facing an unpredictable conversation, and unless we are at karaoke it’s unlikely anyone in the audience is planning to interrupt.

We have had many parents comment that when a child is playing by themselves, or talking to themselves, that their stutter is not present. This could be similar to why one-way communication in singing reduces stuttering.

These three theories may or may not be the reason why we don’t stutter when we sing, it may be a combination of the three, or it could even be something else. The truth is, there is still a lot of research to be done.

What we do know, however, is that while singing, putting on an accent, or otherwise altering the way you speak can reduce stuttering, it is still not a permanent cure – it’s unreasonable to expect  someone to alter their speech 24/7. However if you are concerned about your stutter, please speak to one of our Speech Language Therapists first, before resorting to singing for the rest of your life.

What does a donation to our charity do?

If you’ve ever thought about donating to a charity or a cause, it’s likely you’ve also then wondered about where that money goes. This is a pretty fair question – you’ve worked hard for your money and you want to know that you’re making it go as far as it can.

For many charities, it’s difficult to track where the money goes or how it’s used – and in some unfortunate cases, donations go towards things the donor didn’t want.

We’re proud to say this isn’t how we work at START

As a registered charity, we rely on grants, funding, and donations to help us run, and we are fully transparent about where that money goes.

After operational costs such as rent, salaries, and other important factors, the money we receive goes towards making sure every person in New Zealand who stutters is able to access treatment. While we do have a $60/$45 fee for our sessions, we have a subsidy plan and sliding scale in place as an option for those who find the cost difficult.

The truth is, even though $60/$45 sounds like a lot, to truly cover our costs we would need to charge at least $100 per session. This is something we don’t want to do!

It is so important to us that every Kiwi who stutters has access to the treatment they need, and cost should not be a barrier to receiving support. In fact, we would really like to be in the position one day where we can offer our services for free to everyone.

To get to that point however, we need more support, and donating to our charity is a great way to help us achieve this goal. It costs approximately $1,000 for a preschool child to receive treatment for their stuttering, and if you were to donate even a portion of that, you would be making a massive difference in that child’s life – for their whole life.

Your donation could make a real difference in the lives of Kiwis who stutter, and it would make sure that your hard earned money goes as far as shaping a child’s entire life.

To make a donation today, head to our givealittle page and make a difference.

Reflecting on 2017 – Merry Christmas from START!

This year has been a big year for START! We’ve had lots of opportunities to help people across New Zealand who stutter and it’s been a wonderful journey – thanks for being there with us the whole way!

We’ve found that technology has been a great way for us to reach people , not just those who are Auckland-based, and we can’t wait to continue to see how it will help us grow.

We also published a book! If you haven’t heard yet, for International Stuttering Awareness Day this year, we asked the kids we work with to submit art and writing that discusses their unique experiences as children  who stutter. We received some incredible submissions, and compiled them into a book which you can now purchase! ‘My Stutter’ is a charming little book filled with some amazing pieces on what it’s like to be a Kiwi kid who stutters.  All proceeds go towards supporting us to help those who stutter in New Zealand, and you can pick up your own copy here:

So what is next on our agenda?

Well, firstly it involves a holiday break.  START will be closed from the 21stnd of December until the 9th of January 2018. We’re all looking forward to spending some quality time with our friends and family, and enjoying the Kiwi Summer.

We will also then be closed again from the 18th until the 29th  of January. Why?

2018 involves some big changes and improvements to our organisation – one which we’ve been excited to tell you for a while, and now we finally can!

START IS MOVING!

We’ve loved spending the past 20 years at our site  in Parnell, and we know how convenient the central location has been in the past. However, as Auckland continues to grow and become the bustling metro it’s becoming, START has grown as well.

Travelling across the city is no longer the easy task it once was, and while our Albany clinic has been a great help for many of you, we’re looking to make things even easier for our clients.

This is why, in 2018 we’ll be moving in with The Hearing House at their fantastic new premises in Greenlane! This is a wonderful  opportunity for us to work alongside a similar charity, as well as become more accessible for our clients who might not be as central as they used to be.

We’ll also be looking into establishing more satellite clinics for our clients’ convenience in the future, however we’re firm believers in taking one step at a time!

We will miss our lovely Parnell office, however as the only organisation in New Zealand specialising in helping those who stutter, it’s important that we continue to encourage our charity’s growth as much as possible!

Our new office will be based with The Hearing House at The Stitchbury Bidwill Centre, 251 Campbell Road, Greenlane.which is very close to  the the Greenlane off-ramp. Our clients who live West or North will continue to utilise our Albany  office.

If you’re more of a visual person, hopefully this map helps you!

There will be limited parking available for our clients onsite as well as on-street parks available.

Once again, thank you for joining us on our journey, and thank you for all your support, particularly with our first published book – ‘My Stutter’!

From the entire team here at START, happy holidays! We hope you have a fantastic new year, and can’t wait to see you all in 2018!